Secrets: Why Can't You Go Back There Ever Again?!

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Why can’t you ever go back somewhere ever again?? “I passed out in church a couple of months ago. To this day, I can’t bring myself to set foot in there.” “Banned from a bar in Fairbanks, Alaska for peeing in a Home Depot bucket. In my defense… there was only one stall in the women’s bathroom and 4386 people in line!” “My husband has a lifetime ban from Universal Studios Florida. He took a picture of a woman with large ta-tas and a scandalous outfit and some other woman caught him and told security. Worst part was… that was the 1st and ONLY picture he took on our 4 day trip.

Secrets: What do you know that other people don't?!

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What do you happen to know that other people don’t?? “I know what a lot of my kid’s parents look like without clothes, because we started swinging with them.” “I know my neighbors are on the run from the police and are possibly drug dealers.” “I slept with my boyfriends super hot cousin while my boyfriend was asleep in the next room. I was resentful towards the way he had been treating me. His cousin and I agreed never to talk about this again. This is my first time mentioning it in over 5 years.”

Secrets: Your worst friend moment!

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What did you do that made you a terrible friend?? “I slept with my best friend’s mom.” “I would never tell my best friend/roommate that I had been wearing her underwear when I’m to lazy to do laundry.” “I advertently told my best friend what happened to Dumbledore in the end… She had no idea and didn’t talk to me for a week.”

Secrets: I only did it ONCE!

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What have you done only once and most likely won’t ever do it again?! “I was talked into cave diving (scuba) in a foreign country… terrifying! Never again!” “One threesome was enough for me!” “Hitchhiked.”

Secrets: #ThisIsWhyImBroke

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Why are you broke?! “I just bought a new hot tub with all the frills!!! This is why I’m broke…” “I’m broke because I keep buying things for my house to keep up with the neighbors. Home ownership is so annoying.” “I’m broke because my current job pays terribly. But I start my new job at Hubbard on the 8th!” “I’m broke because I spend all my money on beer and ice cream. Somehow I’m still not fat!”

Secrets: What do you have ZERO interest in?!

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What do you have absolutely ZERO interest in?? “Sex… with my husband!??” “Zero interest in my sister’s stories about my nephew’s baseball games.” “Concerts. Never been to one and don’t want to.” “I have ZERO interest in coffee. Never had it, never will.”

Secrets: What do you do that other people find weird?!

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“I like a slice of cheese with mustard on it as a snack.” “I work as a car salesman (I’m a woman) and have a degree in medical biology and could be working in a hospital.” “People think me wearing thong underwear as a guy is weird.” “I love eating frozen french fries.”

Secrets: I wish I could Tell My Best Friend…

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What do you wish you could tell your best friend so badly?! “Dear best friend: I know you have a huge crush on my husband and your fake voice and fake personality around him make it so obvious.” “To my (former) best friend: your boyfriend is trash!” “I’d love to tell my best friend that my husband fantasizes about hooking up with her husband.”

Secrets: What do you wish you would've never gotten?

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What do you wish you never got? “My matching tattoo…with my now ex-husband…face-palm. Lol.” “I wish I would’ve never gotten male lingerie from my wife. Now she wants me to wear sexy underwear for her all the time…” “A degree in radio broadcast. Lol!!”